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Ladies, We Agree That ‘Stealthing’ Is Bad, But What You Do To Us Infinitely Worse

Sometimes, it sucks to be a guy.

Recently social media has been filled with outrage about something called “stealthing,” when a guy takes off a condom during sex without the girl knowing. While doing that is absolutely despicable, and the outrage is absolutely justified, there’s another kind of stealthing that’s just as damaging that no one seems to want to talk about, when women sneakily save semen after sexual encounters and attempt to artificially inseminate themselves, and force men in court to pay child support for the resulting children.

According to the court case:

During their relationship, the parties discussed the possibility of having children only after they married. Plaintiff informed defendant he did not wish to have children prior to marriage, and intended to use a condom if and when they engaged in sexual intercourse. Defendant understood and agreed. During the entire course of their relationship, the parties engaged in intimate sexual acts three times, with two of those times occurring on the same date. Vaginal penetration never occurred; the parties engaged only in acts of oral sex. Defendant told plaintiff she did not want to have sexual intercourse due to her menses. On or around February 19, 1999, and March 19, 1999, defendant “intentionally engaged in oral sex with [plaintiff] so that she could harvest [his] semen and artificially inseminate herself,” and “did artificially inseminate herself.”

Plaintiff’s complaint alleged further that in May of 1999, defendant confessed to plaintiff that she still was married to her former husband, Dr. Adebowale Adeleye. She told plaintiff she planned to get a divorce, and showed him a “Petition for Dissolution of Marriage,” which was filed on May 20, 1999. In the petition, defendant swore she was not pregnant. The parties’ relationship terminated in May of 1999, upon plaintiff learning defendant was not divorced.

On November 21, 2000, defendant filed a “Petition to Establish Paternity and Other Relief” against plaintiff, claiming she and plaintiff had a sexual relationship eight to ten months before the birth of defendant’s daughter, Serena, on December 1, 1999. DNA tests have confirmed plaintiff is Serena’s biological father.

In the initial court case the judge ruled that the woman’s actions weren’t extreme or outrageous enough for the man to be able to pursue legal action. Luckily, an appellate court ruled that she had “deceitfully engaged in sexual acts, which no reasonable person would expect could result in pregnancy, to use plaintiff’s sperm in an unorthodox, unanticipated manner yielding extreme consequences.”

But even then, they’re only saying that he can claim emotional distress, they’re not allowing him to allege theft of sperm because they say it technically belonged to the woman at that point.

What makes all this even worse was he only found out that she used his sperm to impregnate herself 2 years later once there had been a paternity test confirming that it was in fact related to him. He was then ordered to pay $800 a month in child support.

Now the point of all this isn’t to downplay assholes who are taking off the condom during sex, instead I’d like to see more coverage of victims of both genders instead of the one side we usually see.

If you want to read more of the court case, you can check it out here.

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